{"product_id":"earth-sucks","title":"Earth Sucks","description":"\u003cp\u003eOne star. Would not visit again.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe Earth Sucks tee features a thoroughly unimpressed extraterrestrial sampling the local refreshments and apparently finding the entire planet overrated. With his drink in hand and zero enthusiasm for humanity’s home world, this alien tourist is ready to leave a review.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDesigned in the signature Official Narrative retro sci-fi style, the artwork combines vintage illustration, bold typography, and a limited color palette that pops against black. Perfect for UFO enthusiasts, alien believers, conspiracy-minded skeptics, and anyone who occasionally looks around and thinks the visitor from outer space might have a point.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eEarth Sucks. The reviews are in.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Official Narrative Brand","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":53704768520468,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bwo","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":53704768553236,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bwp","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":53704768586004,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bwq","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":53704768618772,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bwr","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":53704768651540,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bws","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":53704768684308,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bwt","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":53704768717076,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bwu","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":53704768749844,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bwv","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":53704768782612,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bww","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 6XL","offer_id":53704768815380,"sku":"19g61mt3k6bwx","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1021\/4116\/5844\/files\/earth_sucks_new.png?v=1787354220","url":"https:\/\/officialnarrativebrand.com\/products\/earth-sucks","provider":"Official Narrative Brand","version":"1.0","type":"link"}